Lin and Heidi's Wicked Parody
by BBWandAgT
Summary: Our insane Wicked parody! :D
1. No One Mourns the Candlewick!

**Hi there! Welcome to our Wicked Parody! Finally something on the joint account! Hope ya'll like it!**

Ozians: Good News! It's dead! The candlewick of the west is dead! The Wickedest candlewick there-

Heidi: Candlewick? You've got to be kidding me! What's wrong with you people?

Lin: Well what do you expect, they are the Ozians.

Ozians: (sings off key) The wickedest wizard?

Heidi: Wickedest Witch! Get it right! And that was terribly off key!

Glinda: (appears in her bubble) It's good to see me isn't it?

Lin: Not yet!

Glinda: But I was bored, what's taking so long?

Heidi: Take it like a man! Uh, I mean woman!

Glinda: Don't tell me to take it like a man!

Heidi: Ok calm down, I corrected myself, anyways continue on!

Ozian: Look its Glinda!

Glinda: My fellow Americans!

Lin: Uh, did you say Americans?

Heidi: (sigh) This is not going so well...

Lin: Duh!

Glinda: We are in America aren't we?

Heidi: No! How do you even know about America? You can't even do simple spells! We're in Oz!

Glinda: Oh yeah, my bad... My fellow Ozians... Let us be sad, let us be sorrowful-

Lin: Um, I think you mean let us be glad, let us be grateful...

Heidi: Yeah what is this a funeral?

Glinda: Oh it isn't?

Heidi and Lin: FAIL!

Em: (pops in) Hey guys!

Lin: Hey Em! You should help us direct this! It's a disaster!

Heidi: Yes, help would be nice! Great to see you Em!

Glinda: Who's she?

Lin: Our friend from America.

Glinda: Let us rejoicify the bad news-

Em: Um Glinda, its the good news.

Glinda Oh yeah... The good news could subdue, the wicked workings of you know who...

Heidi: This is going too slow!

Ozians: Keiner weint um Hexen. Nicht ein mensch vermisst sir hier-

Heidi: Why are you singing in German?

Ozians: Sorry english gets boring sometimes... No one mourns the Wicked, No one cries they wont return, no one lays a tulip on their grave.

Heidi: You mean a lilly.

Ozians: Goodness knows the Wicked's lives are lonely! Goodness knows the Wicked die alone...

Heidi: You're skipping everything!

Melana and Frex appear

Heidi: Oh no one cares about you. Your really messed up Melena.

Melena: What?

Heidi: You know what I'm saying.

Frex leaves

Glinda: And like every family, they had their secrets.

Lover: Have another drink, my dark eyed beauty, I've got one more night left here in town, have another drink of blue elixir-

Em: Green elixir, the worst thing in the world.

Heidi: Yeah, stupid wizard!

Lin: Uh Heiid? You just revealed that the lover is the wizard. You just spoiled it.

Heidi: Ok ignore what I said. The lover is really some random dude named Bob that is freakishly identical to the wizard.

Lin: Bob?

Heidi: Bob.

Em: Bob?

Heidi: Yes it's Bob ok!

Midwife: It's coming!

Frex: What is?

Midwife: The baby!

Frex: What baby?

Em: Stop being difficult! It's "your" baby.

Frex: Oh yeah... Wait why the air quotes around "your"?

Midwife: It's a girl!

Frex: Er... It's green!

Midwife: Duh.

Frex: Take it away!

Midwife: I cannot do that, that will violate my contract. Bye! (runs off)

Glinda: So you see it couldn't have been easy...

Ozians: We don't care! No one mourns the Wicked! Now at last she's dead and gone. Now at last there's joy throught the land!

Glinda: Yay now I get to show off how high I can sing! (sings with the Ozians)

Lin: Ok let's end this! (sings really fast) No One mourns the Wicked! Wicked! Wicked!

**Ok so what do ya'll think? Please review!**


	2. Dear Old Distractions

**Hi! Here is the next chapter XD I don't have much to say so... Enjoy! I hope Glinda gives you some laughs and makes your day. :D**

Ozian: Is it true you were her friend?

Glinda: Wonderful, they call me wonderful, I am wonderful!

Ozian: Glinda?

Glinda: Oh sorry, what was that?

Ozian: Were you friends with the Wicked Witch? Is it true?

Glinda: You'll be popular, just not quite as popular as meeeeeeeee!

Ozian: Miss Upland?

Glinda: They say we always get what we deserve... Whether good bad or indifferent...

Ozian: HELLO?

Glinda: Shine like the Suuuuuuunnnnnnn!

Ozian, Lin, Heidi & Em: GLINDA!

Glinda: Huh? Oh yes, she was my bestest friend ever! Like my total bff. I met her in school.

Shiz Students: Oh hallowed halls and vine draped wall the proudliest sight there is, when gray and seer our hair hath turned we shall still revere the lessons learned at dear old Shiz, our days at dear old

Glinda: One short day in the emerald city, one- Oh sorry, Ah-ah-ah-ah-ahhhhhhh! Dear old shizzzzz.

Heidi: Thank you for getting it right...

Lin: Haha. Glinda went bi-polar!

Glinda: Hey what do you expect, I stole Fiyero's coffee this morning!

Heidi: Oh no this is very baaaadddd.

Em: Heidi, that's not for another two chapters...

(Fiyero walks in)

Fangirls: FIYERO!

Elphaba: That's my line!

Heidi: Fiyero you are not needed in this scene, go socialize with the fangirls or somehting.

Fiyero: Ok!

(Fangirls cheer)

Heidi: (presses her easy button)

Elphaba: Hey that's not fair! Why does he get to socialize with fangirls?

Glinda: Yeah!

Glinda & Elphaba: He love ME!

(Long Awkward Silence with a cricket chirping in the distance)

Heiid: This is NOT the catfight scene!

Elphaba: I hate you Glinda!

Glinda: I hate you too!

Lin: (sings) Loathing, unadulterated loathing!

Em: Really? That's not in this chapter!

Lin: Sorry couldn't resist.

**So, what do you think? Please review! :D Danke schon!**


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